Tell your class that the following paragraph was written as a brief overview of the "Hollow Log Bluegrass Festival" for the County Line Newsletter. Distribute a copy of the following to each member of the class, announce that they will be role-playing as an editor, and read the instructions to them:

          As editor of the County Line Newsletter, you decide to conduct a short meeting to show reporters what you expect in revision. In preparation for this meeting, rewrite the paragraph below, showing how effective revisions might be made. Use your imagination to fill in needed details. Then follow your revision with a few written comments about why the original was ineffective.

          The outdoor bluegrass jam was filled with music. Musicians played on all kinds of instruments. Dogs were wandering and sometimes barking. Kids were a bit disruptive, but the crowd was appreciative. Vendors sold a variety of souvenirs and great foods.